Dec 6, 2011

Nov 27, 2011

Seasons Greetings

daughter Nicki and her Christmas hat...


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Nov 22, 2011

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

Sunday afternoon Barbara hosted a "Christmas Shower" at her home for a friend soon to be married ... so decorated for Christmas a little earlier than usual. Plus her two brothers and one of her sisters will be here this week for Thanksgiving...so....they also get to see how beautiful her home is this time of year.
Enjoy the video. ... I failed to take pictures of the outside which is also aglow with lights..

Nov 15, 2011

Creativity Takes Courage

Delicious hamburgers, the best onion rings in the world, and GREAT Shakes all wrapped up in the 50's ambiance...
http://cheeburger.com/home2/index.asp

followed by going next door to http://myspiritedart.com/locations/huntsville/ for a fun and creative evening with friends..


Nov 11, 2011

Veterans Day

This morning Thomas and I put flags on his PaPa Peete's grave.


God Bless Our Veterans

A rerun from a year or two back but worth watching again, don't you think?

Christmas is coming to The Gentle Touch Salon and Spa

Barb doesn't have her tree up yet but they've been working very hard to "Christmas up" everything else.....so pretty!

Nov 10, 2011

Veterans Day Program

Yesterday at Thomas and Coopers school (Lynn Fanning Elementary)  a program was presented honoring veterans.  The students were encouraged to bring a picture of a relative who was, or had been, a veteran.  The pictures were displayed in the hall.  During the program all the names of the vets were called. Each student was given a balloon that was later released. It was a moving experience...I was not the only one who had to dry their eyes.





Nov 8, 2011

Why God made little girls





God made the world with its towering trees,
majestic mountains and restless seas,
then paused and said, 'It needs one more thing.'
Someone to laugh and dance and sing,
to walk in the woods and gather flowers,
to commune with nature in quiet hours.
So God made little girls
with laughing eyes and bouncing curls,
with joyful hearts, and beautiful smiles,
enchanting ways and feminine wiles.
And when He'd completed the task He'd begun,
he was pleased and proud of the job He'd done.
For the world when seen through a little girl's eyes
greatly resembles paradise.

Morgan Doe

Oct 26, 2011

Red Hat Society

My latest hat creation...modeled by Barbara...
I made this one for my sister-in-law who is a member of the "Red Hat Society"

Oct 25, 2011

A Fresh Endeavour

So now I've taken leave of life,
I thought you'd like to know, I still
Possess a mind in love, oh wife;
A soulful eye to catch a show of
Silent beauty – ever yours;

An ear to pick the metaphors
Of tonal dance in words you say,
Grasp a thought in verse you pray
Inside your head, bemused of mind,
Softly mournful, intertwined with
Understanding tears.

I'll drift a whisper o'er to you
To tell that I am quietly calm;
Keeping time till your adieu
To flesh, upon the carol of a
Psalm of consummation.
 Now!
A fresh endeavour – we're forever
One together, resting yonder,
Cross our open plane of blue.

 Mark R Slaughter 2009

Oct 21, 2011

Molly Girl

She's finally growing into her Texas Longhorn sweater...and she has needed it this week...but it's going back up into the 70's today..

Oct 1, 2011

New Hats for sale at The Gentle Touch Salon

November is Brest Cancer Awareness Month...so I made this one...

SOLD




                          

Sep 27, 2011

A very special grandmother

Barbara is so good to her grandchildren...in fact, she's so good to everyone..Those four little ones are truly blessed to be part of her.  On what little time she has off from work and taking care of her business ..on her day off ..she takes care of them...all four...and she finds time to do  something special with them.. EVERY week. Last week after taking them to the orchard and then preparing supper for eveyone, (which she does at least one day a week) .. she stayed up 'til midnight making "apple cake pops" ...loaded them in three pretty baskets for the boys to take to school the next day..which happened to be "Johnny Appleseed Day"...
...and I get to make videos with the pictures that she takes...:)


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Sep 19, 2011

Worth Reading Again

Part of an April post on  http://surfergrandma.blogspot.com/


"....Our hearts are so full, and give themselves so completely to what they love ...eventually what we love goes away and we get clobbered.
Try to remember that your beloved is not God. He will die...or you will - one of you will be left alone. The silence on the other end of the relationship makes you wonder if there's anybody there. The banality of your ongoing unpartnered life can make you feel angry and bitter
Love each other well, even if it must be foolishly,  - you will be sorry at the end of your life if your fear of losing love keeps you from ever knowing it, and you will know firsthand that it really is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Accept the kindness of those who see your sorrow, and forgive the blindness of those who cannot.

And then abide with God, after you have lost everything else. So different from the unseen good fairy you may once have thought he was, before your life taught you anything different. So eternally present, so unafraid of your wildest grief or most violent rage....Because your spiritual sense have been changed by your trauma, you now sense things differently. Be patient with yourself as you learn what that way is. And then drink deeply and often at the well."

Sep 13, 2011

I Just Can't Decide...

WHO'S THE CUTTEST ???

MISS MOLLY




OR  CARA ?





 

Sep 4, 2011

Hats

I have my hats for sale at Barbara shop...The Gentle Touch Salon and Spa...






 
                  for 'Bama fans..                        SOLD..but more being made.






SOLD
                       

SOLD


SOLD







SOLD


SOLD





SOLD

Aug 21, 2011

Hats In The Making Here

















I have never been so "accessorized" in my entire life...thanks to Barbara and her gift shop I have watches in every color...my latest, silver wrap watch...
I think he's smiling at me again...

Aug 16, 2011

Like It Is

A Texas friend took the time to copy and mail something to me that she thought might be of some comfort....she has experienced a similar loss three years ago.  Thank you Jeanene.

In the months after Bob's death I was given much reading material... ( a great deal from this very friend)..some of what arrived in my mailbox was read...    most  was not. People just want to reach out...to do something...anything to try and share their feelings...to share that they are sorry....I understand and appreciate those efforts but the time was just not right and also, so much of it is the same..... The article received this week expressed clearly some of what I have learned these last, sad, 16  months...not that I haven't heard some of it before..I guess the timing was right.
ie:
"A Special Language"
"Death is the last taboo. It's not something people want to talk about. It's not something they KNOW HOW to talk about..(myself included..prior to now.)
Our instincts are wrong when it comes to grief.. Without a vocabulary to talk about death, we also lack an understanding of the grief.  (that is a profound truth).
Right around the third month, ( probably longer for your family members) society looks at it's collective watch and says "OK, time to move on." The casseroles have stopped coming.  The support system is ready to move on. But you're stuck.  You're wallowing.
Left behind, alone with their grief, are the husband who lost a wife, the mother who lost a son, the surviving spouse of a suicide, the parent of a child killed by a drunken driver, the wife whose husband was murdered, the child whose parent died.
Without a language and understanding of grief, the communities we usually rely upon often fail us when it comes to loss. (This article is about support groups and although I agree with much of what it says I will not reiterate all of it)
The relatives all have their own healing to go through...their own loss to accept...and they sympathise with you but they have no way of knowing what you are experiencing.
Grief is such an intensely personal and individually unique emotion that the support community for young  widows doesn't work for older widows, the support group for suicide doesn't help those who lost a relative to homicide.  The grief is different for the loss of a husband than the loss of a father.
"Jane Doe" sleeps in bed with the clothes of her husband...the ones worn home from the hospital, folded and tucked beneath his pillow.  They were married 35 years ...he's been dead for three, but she still hasn't accepted his death."
I still spend every night on the couch in my living room...where I  watched my husband  die...where I spent the nights with his hospital bed rolled over beside me and lowered so that I could see him, hear him, touch him. I don't know if I'll ever be able to sleep somewhere else....and I don't care...it's where I want to be.   Before he was unable to open his eyes at all he laid in that room looking out at those windows - the ones in the picture at the top of this blog...just staring into space...he could not talk, hear or move much those last 2-3 weeks...it seemed as though he was preparing himself for death..he was drifting away..he rarely looked into my face...after 57 years of a very close relationship...that was hard...to see him leave me even before he died.

"There is no hierarchy of grief, no loss that is greater than another kind of loss.  But for people whose spouses died after 30,  40,  50  years of marriage, the pain is deep, intense and ENDURING. The loss of a husband or wife is a tangible, physical piece of themselves that is missing, gone forever..  When you have lived with a person for a long time your sense of who you are is very much tied up to that life you built together...when you lose that shared history it leaves you in a very isolated, lonely place."


Back to me:  I feel this way..so acutely..."I'm everything I am because  you loved me"..."he gave me faith 'cause he believed"....etc. ..'makes me appear to be a fairly weak person..dependent...But I Was Not that way..on the contrary, I have been strong...I  have  felt confidence in myself ...to a point...I pretty much said and did what I wanted with little or no objections..., as long as I didn't push TOO much...he would only give so far...but he did go out of his way to keep things pleasant ...he was the most forthright person I've ever known...he spoke what he felt.
 I digress..

When you've lived and loved all your life together with one person you are "one" on so many levels..you don't even realize it..until you lose that biggest part  of  yourself  to death.....as for me, we were so much "one" that  all the dear things that remain (family-home)) are not enough to give me reason to value the time I have left...and I know this is so hurtful to my children...I have loved them dearly..and still do...BUT...the "me" that was - is no longer me. I have not found myself...and if this disappoints my children I am sorry..some believe I have just given up on life....I did not give up on life..my life as it had been since age 16 left me...1951..60 years knowing and loving him...It doesn't make me less than what I always have been...it just makes me different..I feel guilty about this but it's something I have no control over...at least, not now.

The article tells about a man who after losing his wife of 50 years, leaves, without telling his sons, to find her...he literally tried to find her. "He went to  Detroit where they had honeymooned..(Detroit? Honeymoon???)  He went to the Chicago hotel where they had stayed while he attended a plumbers convention and danced in the Blue Room.  He went to The Albuquerque, N.M motel where they had stayed while visiting the meteorite center in Az.  He went to Las Vegas to Circus Circus, the casino where they always stayed.  It was there that he found her.
I thought I saw her in the restaurant.  She was sitting at a table eating..I was going to go up to her and hug her and say, "hello, honey," when two children came up to her on either side and her husband came up to talk to her.  That brought me to my senses. A month after his sons called the police and reported their 85 yr. old dad  missing he returned home to the empty condominium with the his-and-her easy chairs facing an entertainment unit decked with two rows of framed family pictures.  No amount of consolation from friends, family or neighbors could assuage his grief.  He spoke to rabbis, priest and clergymen. Nothing helped...it was later that he discovered the community of grief...with other widows and widowers who shared his experience, felt his loss, spoke the language of a broken heart.,,,you could tell they understood your pain. He began to heal...the intense grief fades but the sadness- the sense of loss remains and can knock you down at anytime. "

There is no place I can go, nothing I can do, that does not bring thoughts of him..the first thoughts when I wake are of him...the last ones at night..the joy or pleasure that these remembrances should give fill my heart with such sorrow..because I know they are over...right now, at this point of my journey the blessings I received from our life together bring only heartache...because it has ended.  ...even when I lie down on that couch at 12-1-2am  for my 3 to 4 hours of sleep I am wearing my ipod.....   in an attempt to control my thoughts away from him by listening to music...most  nights my awake time ends up on the couch peering out those same windows- at the same sky he had watched..crying out to be allowed to just  sense his presence  ...just to know he is there...somewhere...

But he is not there.

I, too, am looking for Bob...I am unwilling to give him up...
I have surrounded myself with his pictures...his corner of the room where all his "special" things are kept...his bibles that he read and studied so diligently, his house slippers beside his recliner.. I  often " busy" myself to the point of exhaustion just to keep myself distracted from thoughts of him.. because when everything shuts off my grief consumes me.
I know this is unhealthy...I am at a loss as to how to overcome it.  I think part of the problem is "I don't want to overcome it." I want to keep him..I'm 76 years old and I see my life as in the past... I feel that I've already had it all...I know that I'm not "special" in any way...I know others get beyond this sort of thing...maybe in time...

I must add that there are times when I can enjoy and receive   small pleasures...when little Cara gives me a kiss or softly says "meme"...when I see the little boys coming across the yard to my cabin..going into the
snack drawer or frig to get something to drink...knowing they are welcomed and loved by me...as Barbara goes to extremes to share and understand and do things that she knows I enjoy....my flowers....but these things treasured are such a small part of my day...there are many hours left to my own resources...and I'm not very strong at all these days...and I don't think I should feel guilty about that ...there are times when you just cannot be strong...and when it gets dark is the worst time...


so don't call me at night.. :) 

Just telling it like it is...

I love and value my children...

Jul 14, 2011

2 am

Insomnia:
Chronic inability to fall asleep or remain asleep for an adequate length of time. 
Sleep Deprivation:
A form of psychological torture inflicted by depriving the victim of sleep. 
Depression:
The condition of feeling sad or despondent. 
Clinical Depression:
A psychiatric disorder characterized by an inability to concentrate, insomnia, loss of appetite, anhedonia (an inability to experience pleasure), feelings of extreme sadness, guilt, helplessness and hopelessness, and thoughts of death. 
Grief:
Deep mental anguish, as that arising from bereavement.
Stages of Grief:
Denial-
Anger-
Bargaining-
Depression-stuck here
Acceptance-

I measure every Grief I meet
by Emily Dickinson

I measure every Grief I meet
With narrow, probing, eyes –
I wonder if It weighs like Mine –
Or has an Easier size.

I wonder if They bore it long –
Or did it just begin –
I could not tell the Date of Mine –
It feels so old a pain –

I wonder if it hurts to live –
And if They have to try –
And whether – could They choose between –
It would not be – to die –

I note that Some – gone patient long –
At length, renew their smile –
An imitation of a Light
That has so little Oil –

I wonder if when Years have piled –
Some Thousands – on the Harm –
That hurt them early – such a lapse
Could give them any Balm –

Or would they go on aching still
Through Centuries of Nerve –
Enlightened to a larger Pain –
In Contrast with the Love –

The Grieved – are many – I am told –
There is the various Cause –
Death – is but one – and comes but once –
And only nails the eyes –

There's Grief of Want – and grief of Cold –
A sort they call "Despair" -
There's Banishment from native Eyes –
In sight of Native Air –

And though I may not guess the kind –
Correctly – yet to me
A piercing Comfort it affords
In passing Calvary –

To note the fashions – of the Cross –
And how they're mostly worn –
Still fascinated to presume
That Some – are like my own –

Jul 7, 2011

He was....

true..to himself and to me...
...he was proud of his children and what he had made of his life...
...he was thankful...
...he was  not "career driven" but worked hard to provide for his family...
...he was a good friend...
...though strong and determined he was tender hearted...
...he was giving of himself...
...he was pretty much "set in his ways"...
...he was, not often but sometimes, unyielding...
...he was too conservative...
...he watched too much Fox Cable News..
...he put me first...
...he was forgiving...
...I'm everything I am because he loved me...
 ...he exhibited grace under pressure...
...even through suffering and death...
..he was more than I can put into words...


...he is gone and my sorrow is unending...

Jul 6, 2011

A proud grandmother

A couple times each year Barbara packs up her grandkids, changes of clothing, snacks, toys, blanket, etc. and heads over to Portrait Innovations...sometimes she's there up to 3 hrs...depending on how busy they are.  The great thing about this company is you view the pictures on a TV screen and make the selections you want to have printed...then, wait a while ? - and take them home with you..along with a disc for viewing on your computer. Here are some of todays shots..
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Jun 16, 2011

a letter from Bob

It's June 16th...the letter that I received from Bob in 1951 that was  closest to this date is postmarked June 12th., 1951..
He had left Covington a few days before, on his way to ship out to Germany from CampKilmer, N.J.

~~~~He was 21, I was 16~~~~


"Camp Kilmer, N.J.
Hi Honey,
Just  a note to remind you of my love and how much I miss you.  I could write an epic  on my devotion to you but it would  be mushy and you probably wouldn't appreciate the sentiment so I'll just tell you about the trip.
  (Oh, darn..I'd rather hear the mush~~~)

We arrived in Evansville, Ind. about 3 in the am. Thursday.  We had 5 hours to look the town over before the train left for Terra Haute.  We traversed the town for 2 hours than moved on to Columbus, Ohio.  After we boarded the troop train we didn't get off until we arrived at Kilmer.  In the process of our journey we passed through Kentucky, Indiana, West Virginia, Ohio, Maryland, Pennsylvania, New Jersey and then went into New York on pass.  Let's discuss New York City for a minute.  There is a town for discussion!  It has a whole heap of everything a body could want or desire.

We went to the Paramount Theatre on Broadway and saw Ray McKinley, his  band and vocalist Peggy Lee.  She's a dream, especially when she sings something like "I Apologize" or "They Say We're Too Young".  I thought of you all the time she performed.  I'm not homesick at all but I wish I were with you. xxxxxxx (he marked through something he had written here ????) Enough mush.

There isn't much I can tell you except I love you honey.  That constitutes this letter sweetheart so I'll cease for tonight.

Sweet dreams sweetheart,
 Bob

Write as often as you can.

Jun 14, 2011

Loneliness

"At times we can feel a sense of loneliness even when we are surrounded by many people. Sri Chinmoy suggests that we feel lonely when we use our mind to separate ourselves from other people. It is easy for the mind to be negative and when we are in a negative state of mind our ego comes to the fore, this is when we are likely to feel more lonely. Furthermore loneliness does not help us in any way but only contributes to our unhappiness.

The cure for loneliness is to use the qualities of the heart to stop judging things and to cultivate happiness."

Easy for you to say....I do not use my mind to seperate myself  from people...death has seperated me.."He slowly took his final breath, 'twas me, my dear, who died a death."



Little do men perceive what solitude is, and how far it extendeth.
For a crowd is not company,
and faces are but a gallery of pictures,
and talk but a tinkling cymbal,
where there is no love.

May 26, 2011

To Where You Are

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it
(anywhere i go you go,my dear;
and whatever is done by only me is your doing)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate,)
i want no world (for  you are my world,)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you .

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
Edward Estlin Cummings

May 16, 2011

A Very Close Call

Willie Drye
for National Geographic News

Published April 28, 2011

"The monster tornado that devastated Tuscaloosa, Alabama  April 27th.  was spawned by unusual "perfect storm" conditions, experts say".
"Mississippi, Alabama, and Georgia had that down to a T. It was a very, very rare day for everything to come together for this type of event," said Samaras, also a National Geographic Society Emerging Explorer. (The Society owns National Geographic News.)

Wednesday, such storms spawned an outburst of a hundred or more twisters, which barreled through six states and killed at least 283 people.
The National Weather Service and state emergency officials are still tallying how many homes were destroyed when waves of tornadoes mowed through the South, killing hundreds in seven states as entire neighborhoods were wiped out in some areas.

Alabama took the hardest hit: The state said 236 people were dead at last count, and 42 of the state's 67 counties have been approved to receive disaster assistance.


The purple lines  = F 5 tornado
      red lines        = F 4 tornados
      yellow lines   = F2  tornados
      green lines       = F 1 tornados

 Hazel Green is in the upper right cornor...the F5 missed us by maybe 6-8 miles.,as the crow flies...
I took the pictures in Anderson Hills Subdivision in Harvest

May 8, 2011

Remembering Mother

 May 31st, 1914..somewhere in Tipton County, Tn......Maizie was born to a poor family who lived in the country and who already had too many children. While still just an infant Minnie and Charles Volz adopted her and one of her brothers, Joe.

 When she was a young teenager her father, whom she adored, left her and her mother to marry a younger woman who happened to be her mothers cousin.

In 1931 at the age of seventeen she met and married Edward Verious Stallings.

He was not a good husband or father...in 1945, shortly after their fifth child was born he hired someone to drive her and the children from Houston, where they were living, back to Covington, Tn...to her mothers. To my knowledge that was the last time she saw him....she and her children were left to live with her mother in a two room area in what had once been her home. The large, two-story house had been purchased by her mothers' brother-in-law and turned into four apartments which Minnie managed in return for a place to live.

She struggled through about eleven years there..for several years she sold tickets at the local movie house. She took a course in some kind of office procedures and later worked in a doctors office.

  In 1956 Bob and I brought her and my three younger siblings to live with us in Mena Ar. After about a year she wanted to go back to Houston to live so Bob took her and the two younger children to Houston where she worked for the same company for 26 years...


After retiring she stayed depressed and became ill ... The summer of 1983 Bob and I drove down to Houston from Chicago and brought her back to live with us....she lived for another 10 years. In 1993 at the age if 79 she died from emphasyma. She had been bed-ridden for nearly a year...near the end her oxygen-deprived mind became impaired..she was fearful and could not sleep.  I became so sleep-deprived that I was forced to put her in a nursing home.  She was less than a mile from our house and I was there with her every day but she felt as though she had been deserted again. She said to me "My mother did not want me, my husband did not want me and now my children do not want me."...In my head I knew that wasn't true..I had not deserted her...but it broke my heart for her to feel that way....and had I known that she would live only three weeks longer I could've held out.

She was a feisty woman...very small in stature...never weighed over 100 lbs. and,  in spite of everything,  had a sense of humor.   She never had a car; never  learned to drive... rode the bus to and from work every day, rain or shine; never had her own home; had very little security... Life was not good to her...but one thing I know...she was not alone her last 10 years;  she was loved and cared for;  she had security.

I love you mother.

May 6, 2011

Another "Smilebox"

So ... the weekend passed by quickly as we enjoyed 3 full days and nights in Texas with Eddie and the boys...got to visit with Laura and her family..SaRita and David..Herk and his family..Christine and Mark...There was seventeen of us together at one time.

When Barb, Lorie and I left Alabama we weren't expecting the cold weather in Dallas...we arrived with only our warm-weather clothes and sandals..We landed at DFW around 6 pm Sat. night...Eddie, the boys, SaRita and David all met us at the airport...we went by Eddies to drop off luggage and than over to Cafe Max to meet up with Herk and Karen, Christine and Mark. I had cream of potato soup and a Caesar salad. We stayed up pretty late Saturday night...looking at different videos on UTube..taking pictures, etc..
Sunday we all met for breakfast at Hubbards in Garland, ...We went from there to Canton to see Laura and her family. It was "First Monday" weekend so we managed to spend some time there...the cold front blew in late that afternoon. Laura came back to Dallas with us. We got back to Richardson around 8 pm I think...went over to Jake's Hamburgers for some supper. We were near a Target so after we ate we went in and purchased something to wear to help keep warm. I got an "all-purpose" rain coat and some canvas shoes..sure made a difference in my comfort..
Eddie and Laura took Monday off from work ... we went to North Park Mall ...had some lunch at LaMadalines and then went to the theater.... . The movie, "Water for Buffalo's" was just so-so..Monday night we had supper at El Fenix in Plano.
Tuesday morning Laura went back to Canton and Eddie went back to work.  We did not have a car so were unable to go anywhere... we rescheduled our pick-up service to DFW for an earlier time...12:30....due to our early arrival and a problem with the plane we ended up being at the airport for about 4 and a half hours...our flight was round trip from Nashville... the cost of a trip to Dallas is much cheaper if taken from there, rather than Huntsville...besides, Huntsville had no power so the airport was closed...soooo...we got home around 11 pm..pooped! Luckly the power was restored at our house on Tuesday!
It was very good to see everyone...but being there makes me sad....we lived there so long..all the places were where we had been together...I miss him so much!

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Apr 25, 2011

April 24th...came and went and I didn't remember

I must be losing my mind! Yesterday, the 24th of April, was our 58th wedding anniversary. ..and I didn't remember...the truth is, I'm no longer aware of what the date is from one day to the next.

Bob's death and my grief has effected me in so many different ways...no one knows unless they have experienced it firsthand . Grief involves so many changes and it's continually developing. One thing I've learned is it takes longer than most people think, myself included. There really is no end..it just evolves from one thing to another. I'm told  that it's a journey and it can't be rushed....I've learned that that is true.

I've made it through the customary "steps"..the shock, or numbness...however, there was no shock involved for us...we knew for some weeks that he was dying..After the numbness wore off there was and still is,  emotional upheaval...at times overwhelming grief :  sadness:   depression:  loneliness:  drugs to sleep and help cope:  over activity, sometimes to the point of exhaustion: over-eating: over spending: neglecting basic needs: some physical distress: creating shrines: experiencing an intense preoccupation with his life: ..all  natural and normal grief responses I'm told!

I've made some healthy choices as well: crying, talking, sharing, attending a support group, journaling (through my blogs), taking small trips,  engaging in activities that I enjoy, such as gardening, allowing myself to laugh and enjoy the little ones in my family.

At this particular time I've become restless and  disorganized. I don't finish things that I start...there are half a dozen "projects" cluttering up the house  that lay undone..I leave the house in disarray for days...I'm unable to concentrate ...I forget everything..(our anniversary!!!)..did I take my pills this am?...I just put those thing away..where are they?...did I pay that bill? have I feed the fish today?
I can't sleep over 3 or 4 hours, even with Rx...and I cry at unexpected times...
So,

  "Please don't ask me if I'm over it yet...I'll never be over it...bereavement isn't a condition that clears up.
   Please don't tell me he's  in a better place...he isn't here with me.
   Please don't say at least he isn't suffering...I haven't come to terms with why he had to suffer at all.
   Please don't tell me God never gives us more than we can bear...
          just say you remember him... let me talk about him...let me cry."

Apr 23, 2011

Classic hamburger drive-in hangout in Dallas serves cheap burgers and beer by the six pack.

For the past 10 or so years it has been customary for the members of our Dallas family to head over to Keller's late Sunday afternoons...and we always made a point to go there when anyone was in town visiting. On a given Sunday there could be anywhere from 6 to 16 (or more) of the Peete clan showing up...car, truck, SUV, etc...there was loud music, bikers, other family groups or just couples hanging out, enjoying the food and atmosphere.

In Short: Old, dirty, run-down, noisy, hot, crowded....BUT---the best burger in town...chili cheese tots...ummmm.
I miss it.

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"This burger joint isn't about the perfect recipe, it's about the style in which it is served. Patrons park their vehicles under one of the many ports and a waitress comes out to greet them and take their order. The grub is brought back to the car for noshing. On weekends, bikers and classic cars enthusiasts fill the lot. The burger menu offers hot dogs, fries and chicken tenders." quote from The Dallas Observer..